I Have Issues

When I first started this Blog I wanted to write funny posts.

The whole thing was going to be a witty little laughfest!

I wanted to amuse myself and if my friends were amused as well, that was a bonus.

Oh yes! Bug Soup, the funny blog!

The Sedaris of Buggy Blogs!

Well, it turns out that I have issues.

I sometimes have stuff I need to rant about ( who knew?)

It usually isn't major stuff, not worldly or important, but it's my stuff and I need to talk about it. Or maybe just question the why of it all.

So I'm sorry I'm not being funny, I really did have good intentions for this place.

I have several issues lately, please indulge me .

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Hillary Duff.

As teenbopper pop idols go, she isn't the worst ( not by a long shot) , and I am happy and thankful that my 13 yr old daughter doesn't see celebrities as role models.

My issues with Ms. Duff aren't even about her, it's about how she is being marketed.

The Disney Channel now has some decent sitcoms aimed at teen viewers, and a few witty cartoons ( shout out for Kim Possible!) that my daughter enjoys. The programing lately is more intelligent than the crap my kid was watching on Cartoon Network , this is all good.

Except for the Hillary Duff thing.

Disney Channel is obsessed with her.

Hillary Duff doesn't dress sleezy, she isn't half naked, her song lyrics aren't about sex.

My problem is that they play her video about 3 times an hour. All day. Everyday.

I have seen HDuff's video about 34 gabillion times in the last week!

Enough already!

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Co- workers

The new gal at my work.

She is nice, she is hardworking, she learns quick!

I really want to like her, and in some ways I do. We all want her to work out because we need a strong team and we worked short staffed for the last 2 months of the school year and it was awful. She would so be a perfect fit, if not for one, little , potentially huge, thing.

First day of training we noticed that she had a BIG pin on her shirt that said, " I LOVE JESUS"

Then there were the 12 or 16 "JESUS" keyrings, and the 20 or so stickers on her truck that declared her love for the Lord.

Okay, I have no problem with folks who have a strong faith, none at all. Most of the women I work with would call themselves Christian, and some even go to Church every week.

Within the first 3 hours she starts talking about being "Saved" and how she was an addict, she even showed us a picture of herself at 94 lbs, telling us how prayer saved her a year ago.

I want to like her, but am wondering if she is one of those people who traded one addiction for another ( granted "Jesus" is a healthier addiction than drugs) , fanatics of any sort make me nervous, especially those that think they know best for everyone.

A week later and she seems to be working out as far as the job goes, but over the last week I've noticed that I am the main one she has decided to SAVE.

I think it's because I am polite, because I really want to respect her views, because I don't tell her to shove it, and because I made the mistake of saying " GAWDAMMIT!" in front of her the other day. ( Which is a rather mild swear in the kitchen by the way, we don't swear in front of the kids, but the kitchen is a raunchy vocal place)

I don't want to be saved at work!

My relationship with God is personnal, it's none of her business.

She has no idea what my religious views are ( she has never bothered to ask , anyone).

For all she knows I am Jewish or Wiccan or Atheist or even a Born Again Christian; that doesn't seem to matter to her as she sweetly hands out her prayer cards, and witnesses about her recovery and HER faith in Jesus.

She had the nerve to lecture me the other day about how God doesn't want me to smoke cigarettes, she was telling me how bad they were for me, and how after 30 years of smoking, God saved her from cigarettes cold turkey. Good for her! Today she talked to me about swearing, and how bad it is, and how God doesn't like it.

She has no idea that I know how bad smoking is for me, more than she will ever know. How dare she think she knows anything about me, or my life experiences, or my beliefs.

My Faith, MY Truth, MY personnal relationship with MY higher power!

She is just quietly and sweetly trying to impose her beliefs on me, never asking what I believe, just asuming that I am somehow just waiting for someone to tell me about Jesus.

But Dammit! She is so nice about it, so sneaky.

I haven't had to oppurtunity to tell her off without looking like a big crazy bitch.

My Husband suggested I go way out and tell her I am a Pagan, ( whose beliefs I have some fondness for) or better yet ( in his opinion) a Satanist. Well that is all fine and good for the shock value, if it isn't someone you have to work with everyday.

But I don't lie, not ever about anything important, and ones Faith is important, at least mine is to me.

And the other thing is, I kinda want to like her, and it makes me mad that she is wrecking that.

She thinks she is "helping " people. So is that noble, or just plain rude?

I've only known her a week. I need to find a way to respect her faith, while making it clear that mine is none of her business, and I don't share hers.

Oh, and have I mentioned that I am really good at training in the kitchen? That new people always seem to seek me out because I really want them to do well, and I explain things better than most. I want her to come to me when she has questions, I want her to be good at her job, I want to help her, I want to like her.

I don't want to be saved.

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I had more to write about tonight, but the gawddamned fucking hamster decided to escape and we spent 2 motherfucking hours getting the vicious little asshole back in his stupid cage .

( Kate and I did pray while he was loose)

The trick seems to be that the little biter can't resist bananas, and so he won't be eaten by a dog today.

It's now 3 a.m. and he is chewing on the cage bars and plotting his next escape.

I miss the old hamster.

But like I said, my issues aren't all that deep.