Bug Soup

A Broth of Rambling Thoughts ( with some morsels of 'silly' thrown in for flavor)

Saturday, August 27, 2005

I Have Issues

When I first started this Blog I wanted to write funny posts.
The whole thing was going to be a witty little laughfest!
I wanted to amuse myself and if my friends were amused as well, that was a bonus.
Oh yes! Bug Soup, the funny blog!
The Sedaris of Buggy Blogs!
Well, it turns out that I have issues.
I sometimes have stuff I need to rant about ( who knew?)
It usually isn't major stuff, not worldly or important, but it's my stuff and I need to talk about it. Or maybe just question the why of it all.
So I'm sorry I'm not being funny, I really did have good intentions for this place.
I have several issues lately, please indulge me .
Hillary Duff.
As teenbopper pop idols go, she isn't the worst ( not by a long shot) , and I am happy and thankful that my 13 yr old daughter doesn't see celebrities as role models.
My issues with Ms. Duff aren't even about her, it's about how she is being marketed.
The Disney Channel now has some decent sitcoms aimed at teen viewers, and a few witty cartoons ( shout out for Kim Possible!) that my daughter enjoys. The programing lately is more intelligent than the crap my kid was watching on Cartoon Network , this is all good.
Except for the Hillary Duff thing.
Disney Channel is obsessed with her.
Hillary Duff doesn't dress sleezy, she isn't half naked, her song lyrics aren't about sex.
My problem is that they play her video about 3 times an hour. All day. Everyday.
I have seen HDuff's video about 34 gabillion times in the last week!
Enough already!
Co- workers
The new gal at my work.
She is nice, she is hardworking, she learns quick!
I really want to like her, and in some ways I do. We all want her to work out because we need a strong team and we worked short staffed for the last 2 months of the school year and it was awful. She would so be a perfect fit, if not for one, little , potentially huge, thing.
First day of training we noticed that she had a BIG pin on her shirt that said, " I LOVE JESUS"
Then there were the 12 or 16 "JESUS" keyrings, and the 20 or so stickers on her truck that declared her love for the Lord.
Okay, I have no problem with folks who have a strong faith, none at all. Most of the women I work with would call themselves Christian, and some even go to Church every week.
Within the first 3 hours she starts talking about being "Saved" and how she was an addict, she even showed us a picture of herself at 94 lbs, telling us how prayer saved her a year ago.
I want to like her, but am wondering if she is one of those people who traded one addiction for another ( granted "Jesus" is a healthier addiction than drugs) , fanatics of any sort make me nervous, especially those that think they know best for everyone.
A week later and she seems to be working out as far as the job goes, but over the last week I've noticed that I am the main one she has decided to SAVE.
I think it's because I am polite, because I really want to respect her views, because I don't tell her to shove it, and because I made the mistake of saying " GAWDAMMIT!" in front of her the other day. ( Which is a rather mild swear in the kitchen by the way, we don't swear in front of the kids, but the kitchen is a raunchy vocal place)
I don't want to be saved at work!
My relationship with God is personnal, it's none of her business.
She has no idea what my religious views are ( she has never bothered to ask , anyone).
For all she knows I am Jewish or Wiccan or Atheist or even a Born Again Christian; that doesn't seem to matter to her as she sweetly hands out her prayer cards, and witnesses about her recovery and HER faith in Jesus.
She had the nerve to lecture me the other day about how God doesn't want me to smoke cigarettes, she was telling me how bad they were for me, and how after 30 years of smoking, God saved her from cigarettes cold turkey. Good for her! Today she talked to me about swearing, and how bad it is, and how God doesn't like it.
She has no idea that I know how bad smoking is for me, more than she will ever know. How dare she think she knows anything about me, or my life experiences, or my beliefs.
My Faith, MY Truth, MY personnal relationship with MY higher power!
She is just quietly and sweetly trying to impose her beliefs on me, never asking what I believe, just asuming that I am somehow just waiting for someone to tell me about Jesus.
But Dammit! She is so nice about it, so sneaky.
I haven't had to oppurtunity to tell her off without looking like a big crazy bitch.
My Husband suggested I go way out and tell her I am a Pagan, ( whose beliefs I have some fondness for) or better yet ( in his opinion) a Satanist. Well that is all fine and good for the shock value, if it isn't someone you have to work with everyday.
But I don't lie, not ever about anything important, and ones Faith is important, at least mine is to me.
And the other thing is, I kinda want to like her, and it makes me mad that she is wrecking that.
She thinks she is "helping " people. So is that noble, or just plain rude?
I've only known her a week. I need to find a way to respect her faith, while making it clear that mine is none of her business, and I don't share hers.
Oh, and have I mentioned that I am really good at training in the kitchen? That new people always seem to seek me out because I really want them to do well, and I explain things better than most. I want her to come to me when she has questions, I want her to be good at her job, I want to help her, I want to like her.
I don't want to be saved.
I had more to write about tonight, but the gawddamned fucking hamster decided to escape and we spent 2 motherfucking hours getting the vicious little asshole back in his stupid cage .
( Kate and I did pray while he was loose)
The trick seems to be that the little biter can't resist bananas, and so he won't be eaten by a dog today.
It's now 3 a.m. and he is chewing on the cage bars and plotting his next escape.
I miss the old hamster.
But like I said, my issues aren't all that deep.


Blogger Monstah said...

Well for as how to handle your co-worker I think you first need to ask yourself: "What would Hillary Duff do"?

But seriously Buggy, her preaching at work is unacceptable.

2:25 PM  
Blogger Monstah said...

PS Can I link you?

2:26 PM  
Blogger HistoryDetective said...

No, she isn't noble. She's rude. I would add obnoxious ... but at least they didn't hire Hillary Duff to work in the kitchen.

3:15 PM  
Blogger Buggy said...

Yes Monstah! Link away.

And HD, I would love to see Hillary Duff wearing our ugly work uniforms, as long as I don't have to watch her video anymore.

7:22 PM  
Blogger Bravie said...

As for the Hillary Duff every 5 minutes. Make it a fun game. Everytime her video comes on do the YMCA dance. When that gets old change it up and do the hustle. It will be a way for you to have fun AND it will be educational. You will be teaching Katiebug the history of dance.

As for the Jesus preaching co-worker. Everytime she starts to preach to you, do the YMCA dance. Tell her you have a form of tourette's syndrome and that whenever you hear the word Jesus your tourettes kicks in and you involuntarily do the YMCA. Put on a confused look and tell her how strange it is and even the doctors can't figure it out.

9:08 AM  
Blogger augie said...

I agree with Monsty, preaching at work is unacceptable. The decision you are probably going to have to make is do you tell her to stop and risk hurting her feelings, or do you let her continue to try to "save" you and let her drive you nuts.

Oooooo! I know. You should point out the co-workers who have worse "vices" than you do. Take the spotlight off of you and put it square on someone else.
Buggy - Hey Jesus Freak. Did you know Betty Lou has breast implants?
Jesus Freak - *gasp* No I did not. *grabs bible and runs off after Betty Lou*

And? I think you are one of the last people on earth who would need to be saved. You are a gem. Well, except for that unreasonable Hillary Duff hate you seem to have. :-)

9:58 AM  
Blogger Buggy said...

LOL! Augie, do you realy think anyone in this shit ass small town has breast implants? Ha Ha Ha!
I think though that I am going to find a time to tell her that I like her, and explain that though I respect her views that I have my own.
If that doesn't work I am going to tell her the dishwasher gal reads tarot cards and believes in astrology.
But seriously, you guys all know what I went through last year. Without faith, without prayer, I would never hve gotten out of bed again.
How do people go on each day if they don't believe in something?
Even if it's just their own mind as their higher power.
You have to have something to hold on to.
I don't need to be "saved" to have faith.
Thanks guys, I think I'm working this out, I think I am going to find the right words to tell her.

10:01 PM  
Blogger Coco said...

I .heart. the bug.

Plus, I think your approach is exactly right. You lose nothing by being polite and firm first, at least. THEN will be the time to tell her that the school principal spends a lot of time inappropriately touching goats.

7:19 PM  
Anonymous newsome said...

I like the firm but nice approach of telling her you appreciate her views and faith, but she's planted her seed and it's time for her to move on and see if it grows. In other words, tell her to step back and let God work if He feels the need to do so.

As for Ms. Duff, I'm shocked to hear of your hatred. She is a fine upstanding young woman... And Jesus loves her.

3:27 PM  
Blogger jenbeauty said...

Make me laugh damnit! Oh, and I can save you.

I can empathize with the Ms. Duff situation, it is non-stop at my home currently.

8:16 AM  
Blogger Jolene said...

Buggy, I think your approach with the preaching co-worker sounds like the right one.

By the way, I am really cracking up over the fact that you called your hamster a little asshole.

7:53 PM  
Blogger Supes said...

Can I help? Yes! I can!

Next time Jesus Freak starts in on you, say this:

Listen, JesusFreak (<---insert real name here)... I didn't want to say anything to you before, because I like to hear the testament of others, but I am very firm in my beliefs and they really don't differ that much from your own. The thing is, I don't feel as if you really have any idea about what Jesus believes and I don't like it when you claim to know what he has said when you don't. I defy you to point out the place in the Bible where Jesus says that smoking cigarettes is wrong and no where does he mention anything about swear words except taking his name in vain. I think you need to brush up on your knowledge of your own savior before you claim to represent him.

6:19 PM  
Blogger Wheeze said...

What Chris said.

4:11 PM  
Blogger Tishy said...

Is your co worker born again? Tell her you were born right the first time. I use that all the time and it always works

1:27 PM  
Blogger Glowie said...

If you don't update soon, we are going to have issues.


2:22 PM  
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